There's just no other way to say it. Well, I can think of a few other choice words, but I'll stick with prick for now.
I'm not even sure how much I wrote about this earlier in the year, but his relationship with the girls has been basically weekend phone calls for the past couple of years, with a few visits thrown in here and there. Earlier this year, before Valentine's Day to be more exact (because the girls specifically remember him not calling on that day), he stopped calling. I finally called his mom, found out that he was no longer living there, and no one knew where he was.
When he re-appeared in April, I was done. Sylvia was getting back into therapy, my child support case against him had just been closed (since they could never find him), and his spotty, unpredictable, and undependable presence in their lives was just causing all of us more pain than we deserved. So I forbade him from speaking to them.
Sylvia took it pretty well. She'd had a really tough time with his latest disappearance, and I think she was relieved that I'd set the boundaries.
But 3 1/2 weeks ago, she asked if she could speak to him. After talking it over with her therapist, we decided that phone calls would be okay. Her therapist and I are both aware that the phone calls will most likely stop again, but at least she would BE in therapy and we'd have some tools and resources for handling it.
So I let the girls call their dad that Sunday. He promised them that he would call every Sunday. He managed to call on Father's Day. And three weeks into it, he didn't call this Sunday.
We were home, my cell was on...no missed calls. To make it even worse, Sylvia's taking on the blame since he gave her his number and she didn't call him. It's SO not right for her to feel any culpability in this, and I didn't even mention to her the chances that the number he gave her is probably no good anymore. His cell phone services rarely last more than 24 hours.
It pisses me off SO much. I don't understand why he can't even live up to the simple responsibility of knowing when it's Sunday and picking up a phone.
I can understand not paying child support. A drug addict rarely has money. I can understand not being able to live up to the conditions so that he can have visitation; it involves WORK on his part. But not being able to pick up a phone? That's just being a selfish prick.
And on TOP of that, he actually gave me crap for not letting him talk to the girls for two months. Claiming to be their father, that he has rights. His one - ONE - responsibility that I actually hoped he would live up to for at least 2 months (8 phone calls), he couldn't do. Must the girls keep their expectations of their father so low?
It's just so not fair. They're amazing little girls. They live up to responsibilities I give them every day. They're loving and funny and fun. And they've made it extraordinarily easy for him to make them happy. All he has to do is call once a week. Why does he choose to break their hearts instead? Really, how does a man do that? And claim to be a parent.
What a prick.